June 2011
11 posts
Super Hero
 Precface: Not uncommonly, discussing our potential super hero powers Tracey: What would Lucy’s be? Dave: Hmm… Shaney: What about the ability to manipulate glass?! Lucy: Ya, like Magneto! But With Glass!! *we all vote yes* Dave: Great, oh but he can only Stained Glass!! Lucy: WTF Tracey: and his flaw is that he can’t enter churches! Lucy: ?!?!?!
Jun 30th
Silly Sally
Hanging out with a few friends at my house Shaney: (to my mom) Sally, is your name short for something? Sally: …arg. Nope it’s just Sally. Tracey: My mom hates her name Sally: its just so annoying. Sall-Y. Sall-EEEEE Tracey: No, its cute like Mustang Sally! Sally: Oh whatever. Sally sounds like Tracey HAHAAH. Sall-EEE, Trace-EEE. Hahahaha. Same thing Tracey: Mom wtf. Sally:...
Jun 26th
Shotgun
Last night in Sydney, small get together at a bar with friends Simone: TRACEY! omg! Tequila! Lets get tequila! Tracey: I really don’t feel like it, I mean i’m not even drinking Simone: Oh don’t be a downer! Its so much fun and you’re leaving! Tracey: I dunno… Simone: Shut up! come on! I’m buying! Tracey:…okay, fine, go on… *bar tender pours 1...
Jun 21st
Typical Tracey
Preface: I went to give blood the other day and a few months later… Mom: You have mail from the blood donation company Tracey: Probably to tell me my blood type *opens letter* Tracey: It says “You are O negative.” Mom: What’s that mean? Tracey: I’ll google it… “the Universal Donor but Soul Receiver. The blood type is the most needed and seldom...
Jun 19th
In a land far, far away
On the phone Marco: so do you miss me? Me: ya Marco: I would miss me …
Jun 18th
TSS
My friend Hayley came to visit me in Sydney this was one of her experiences: Guest Post: by Hayley S. Sydney is undoubtebly one of the most famous cities in the world it offers famous landmarks like the operah house, great beaches and an exciting nightlife.However, a foreigner to Sydney should be forewarned about the horrific customer service one will be subjected too upon arrival. My friend...
Jun 17th
Beauty and the Beast
Scene: mom saying goodnight to my sister and I Mom: ( to Emma) night lovey!!! Emma: night. Mom: ( to me) night trace Me: night Mom: (points at Emma) Beauty…. (points to me)… And the Beast! (laughs like a goon) WTF
Jun 14th
Bon Voyage
When I got home from Sydney My room looked like a warehouse It included: A bag of my sisters old ballet shoes Newspapers from the last 5 years Pillows no one is using Stuffed animals I have never seen Bags of clothing Graduation paraphernalia dated 2009, I don’t even know who graduated in 2009! Tracey: Mom why is my room full of things from 100 years ago Mom: You were gone! Tracey:...
Jun 13th
Hello?
My family should not have a home phone. At all. Because NO ONE answers it. And then i get vengeful  *Ringing* Mom: SOMEONE GET THE PHONE Dad: I’M IN THE BASEMENT Mom: EMMA GET THE PHONE *Emma Turns up music* *Tracey tries to open the front door to leave* Mom: TRACEY ANSWER THE BLOODY PHONE Tracey: !@##$@#. *runs across the room to the phone* [Conversation] Tracey: Hello?!...
Jun 6th
Oh McGill
Scene: Dan’s mother showing off his diploma in soil science Dan’s mom: Oh, i’m so proud of you both! I can’t believe you finished McGill already! *handing me his diploma* Me: (looking at degree) I can’t beleive our entire diplomas are written in Latin! You can’t even read what we’ve graduated in!  Dan: What?! They’re in English… Me:...
Jun 5th
Plane Jane
Preface: Finally fell asleep on my fourteen hour flight to LA Tracey: Zzzzzzzzzzzz *Wakes up suddenly* Tracey: (to girl) … did you just kick me in the head!? Girl: Sorry, I was going to the bathroom Tracey: (confused) Did you jump over me?! Girl: …ya Tracey: Your boyfriend’s sitting closer to the bathroom… Girl: He’s watching a movie! Tracey: so you JUMPED...
Jun 3rd