here's the story...

Preface: My sister and I playing with her Iphone.

Sister: I love apps! 

Me: I know..

Sister: Have you seen my frogs? 

Me: What? 

Sister: The Pocket Frogs app lets you breed frogs!

Me: I love frogs!

Sister: What about Tiny Tower?

Me: What’s that? 

Sister: YOU BUILD A TINY TOWER!

Me: Just what I’ve always wanted… Can we be social and talk about something normal?

*pause*

Sister: I can’t believe Emma thinks I’m fatter than her

Me: No she doesn’t…

Sister: She said “look at your arms then look at mine, you’re obviously bigger than me.”

Me: Well, you’re not. You don’t think I’m fat and we’re the same size so don’t be dumb.

Sister: Are we?

Me: Probably

Sister: How much do you weigh?

Me: I really don’t know. 

Sister: OMG Let’s weigh ourselves so we know who’s fatter!

Me: I don’t even have a scale!

Sister: (pauses while thinking) OMG Do you think there’s Iphone app for that?!

Me: No.

Sister: I bet there is!

Me: Please don’t stand on your phone.

Preface: My sister’s been having hip problems 
(problems with her hip not problems being “hip”)

Mom: How’s your hip?

Sam: *limp, limp* Painful, I just came home from the physiotherapist

Mom: Did he diagnose you?

Sam: Not yet, but there’s a lot of inflammation. 

Mom: I think I know your problem

Sam: Really?!

Mom: Ya, um what’s it called…?

*pause*

Dyslexia.

Sam: What?!!?!

Mom: That’s why your hip hurts!

Tracey: Her hip pain is caused by a learning disorder?!

Mom: Tracey! Don’t be rude!

…