Preface: It’s no secret that my family’s weird…
Mom: Everyone’s heading to Vermont for a vacation.
Me: Who’s everyone?
Mom: The whole family.
Me: Grandma said it’s only couples.
Mom: That’s not true, your cousin’s new girlfriend isn’t coming.
Mom: Apparently her husband had a problem with it.
Me: (Sarcastically) Gosh, men can be so possessive…
Mom: Honestly, what a loser.
Me: Who? The girlfriend?
Mom: No! The husband. Obviously.